Present Path Tarot
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A Wider Spectrum of Love
I finished season one of the Telepathy Tapes podcast. Now I have been binging Love on the Spectrum‘s new season. These got me thinking about how wonderful community can be when we include more acceptance of the socially awkward outliers.
This thought is also supporting my own neurospicy self, as s some of my regular readers know that I found out a year ago I have ADHD.
My junior high best friend Sarah kept telling me I was a clear candidate.
“Look at the class we met in,” she’d say, talking about the VISIONS class we were both put in in the 7th grade, “look at who was in that class with us and how they ran it. It was for people LIKE US, Jenna.”
I didn’t realize my own issues because my own community is rampant with people who are ADHD AF. One of my friends gets a minder at weddings to make sure she shows up to photos and her bridesmaid duties in reasonable time.
I thought that I simply had picked up habits of it from my mom, who is a text book example. (Sorry mom, it’s true.)
Then I saw a list of the signs in young girls and there was not a question left, so I got a proper diagnosis.
My therapist asked me why it was important for me to know. I said that it gives me compassion and self-awareness for all the ways I haven’t fit in. And it gives me new tools to improve my habits.
The thing is, I think this growing area of psychological research is going to find that everyone is in their own mode of unique brain.
We are all relying on a false presumption that we think and function in the same ways.
My friend Michele is a therapist who says that there is probably no such thing as neurotypical. We just haven’t found the other varietals yet.
I also surround myself with people who identify as autistic, but you wouldn’t know it at first as they are all (likely) low level 1.
The DSM definition of level 1 autism is simply “requiring support”. As I get to know these smart lovable people beyond their masks, I see that they do need a subtle kind of support and a wider range of acceptance.
I love when a neurospicy person asks if they can info dump about the book they’re reading about volcanoes. Let me get a cup of tea and sit for a spell.
It’s a gift for us to have a keen eye to see when our friend is dysregulating and offer them to step outside or loan them some earplugs at the show.
I am so happy to live in a place where friends can say with total respect, “Don’t talk about eggs in front of Ted”, and it’s no big deal.
While we all need to wear masks to function as a society, our friends can be the people we get to take our masks off with. We can trust that they will accept our oddball quirks.
I cried during the moment in Love on the Spectrum where Madison dysregulates because she is called “Maddy”. She calms herself while talking about how she’s learning to manage these triggers. Her partner stands by her calmly, nodding his gentle support.
She is doing the work to self-care, and her loved ones see her and appreciate her self-awareness and effort toward growth. She’s accountable and they are supportive.
Whether we are neurospicy or not, isn’t that what we all desire?
We all want to be able to be our natural selves and be seen in how we are doing our best to evolve. We each get dysregulated in our own ways. We each need compassion with loving accountability around it.
We all have to learn the social rules and adapt to them, but it’s harder for some people. This is not excusing obnoxious behavior or welcoming main character vibes.
This is saying let’s acknowledge that the norms we designed are somewhat arbitrary. If it doesn’t upheave a group experience, let’s collectively let it ride.
I prefer to live in a world where everyone is given some balance of freedom with respect for their efforts to play along with our cultural agreements.
Neurodivergents are often the artists and musicians and scientists who see outside the average and make the inventions that change the world, like the very one I am typing on right now.
Albert Einstein wore the same style suit every day with a monotonous wardrobe choice. You can too.
You don’t have to hold an identity title if you don’t want to, you can just be you (in the ways that don’t hurt others). Because we are all a bit strange after all.
The more we accept the outliers, the more we get to relax and unmask our quirks as well.
If you know someone who needs to hear this message, please share this newsletter.
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Hold the hand of your favorite neurospicy friend during a Tarot Together session.
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Have a great weekend of being your full self and loving the neurodiversity in your community.
Scroll down for a Flip Through of the Opal Oracle by Heather Agosta below.
Love Your Full Community,
Jenna Lynne Roberts